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Humor
& Jokes Unlimited - Other Humor 2
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Race Eh?
A newfie wanted to learn how to sky
dive. He
got an instructor and started lessons. The instructor told the newfie
to
jump out of the plane and pull his rip cord. The instructor then
explained
that he himself would jump out right behind him so that they would go
down
together. The newfie understood and was ready.
The time came to have the newfie jump from the air plane. The
instructor reminded him that he would be right behind him. The newfie
proceeded
to jump from the plane and after being in the air for a few seconds
pulled
the rip cord. The instructor followed by jumping from the plane. The
instructor
pulled his rip cord but the parachute did not open. The instructor,
frantically
trying to get his parachute open, darted past the newfie.
The newfie seeing this yelled, as he undid the straps to his parachute,
"So you wanna race, eh?" |
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After years of scrimping
and saving,
a husband told
his wife the good news:
"Honey, we've finally got
enough money to buy what we started saving
for in 1989."
"You mean a brand-new
Cadillac?" she asked eagerly.
"No," said the husband, "a 1989 Cadillac."
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Woman Of His Dreams
A young man
called his
mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of
his dreams. "Now what should I do?"
His mother has an idea. "Why don't
you send her flowers, and on the card invite her to your
apartment for a home cooked meal?"
He thought this was a great strategy, and a week later the woman came
to dinner.
His mother called the next day to see how things had gone.
"I was humiliated,"
he groaned. "She insisted on washing
the
dishes."
"What's wrong with that?"
asked his mother.
"We hadn't started eating
yet." |
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