12 Reasons Why God Created Dogs
12 Reasons Why God Created Dogs calendar offers a year’s worth of visual treats and fun for all dog-lovers. This 13 months wall calendar features daily grids with ample room for jotting appointments, birthdays and reminders; U.S. holidays and Canadian holidays in French and English.


"My dog took first prize at the cat show."
"How was that?"
"He took the cat."

On one occasion the local minister delivered a sermon of but ten minutes' duration—a most unusual thing for him.

Upon the conclusion of his remarks he added: "I regret to inform you, brethren, that my dog, who appears to be peculiarly fond of paper, this morning ate that portion of my sermon that I have not delivered. Let us pray."

After the service the clergyman was met at the door by a man who as a rule, attended divine service in another parish. Shaking the good man by the hand he said:

"Father, I should like to know whether that dog of yours has any pups. If so I want to get one to give to my minister."

"Do you know that that pitbull dog of yours killed my wife's little harmless, affectionate poodle?"
"Well, what are you going to do about it?"
"Would you be offended if I was to present him with a nice brass collar?"

William, for several years local station agent at local railroad company, was peacefully promenading his platform one morning when a rash dog ventured to snap at one of William's plump legs. He promptly kicked the animal halfway across the tracks, and was immediately confronted by the owner, who demanded an explanation in language more forcible than courteous.

"Why," said William when the other paused for breath, "your dog's mad."

"Mad! Mad! You double-dyed blankety-blank fool, he ain't mad!"

"Oh, ain't he?" cut in William. "Gosh! I should be if any one kicked me like that!"



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"Here comes Mrs. Blinkers. She's got a new baby, and she'll talk us to death."
"Well, here comes a neighbor of mine who has a new setter dog. Let's introduce them and leave them to their fate."
"Prisoner, why did you assault this landlord?"
"Your Honor, because I have several little dogs he refused to rent me a flat."
"Well, that is his privilege."
"But, your Honor, he calls his apartment house 'Little Dog House'"
One cold, wintry morning a tall and skinny build man was walking down a steep hill at a quick pace. A treacherous piece of ice under the snow caused him to lose control of his feet; he began to slide and was unable to stop.
At a cross-street half-way down the decline he encountered a large, heavy woman, with her arms full of bundles. The meeting was sudden, and before either realized it a collision ensued and both were sliding down hill, a grand ensemble—the thin man underneath, the fat woman and bundles on top. When the bottom was reached and the woman was trying in vain to recover her breath and her feet, these faint words were borne to her ear: "Pardon me, madam, but you will have to get off here. This is as far as I go."