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English Sketches From Life 1


Where can a man buy a cap for his knee?
Or a key for a lock of his hair?
Can his eyes be called an academy,
Because there are pupils there?
In the crown of his head what gems are set?
Who travels the bridge of his nose?
Can he use, when shingling the roof of his mouth,
The nails on the ends of his toes?
What does he raise from a slip of his tongue?
Who plays on the drums of his ears?
And who can tell the cut and style
Of the coat his stomach wears?
Can the crock of his elbow be sent to jail,
And if so, what did it do?
How does he sharpen his shoulder blades?
I'll be hanged if I know-do you?

- From Boston Evening Transcript.
A New York paper, describing a funeral in Jersey City, says: "At the ferry four friends of the deceased took possession of the carriage and followed the remains to Evergreen Cemetery, where they were quietly interred in a new lot without service or ceremony." The devotion of the friends of the deceased was certainly remarkable, but one can not help wondering what became of the remains.

May Catch Them Later

Thelma Smith, a little Eastside girl, has heard a great deal about the danger of contracting disease from handling articles belonging to others. She has been taught that she must not use the brushes and combs
of other members of the family. On one occasion the little tot was found industriously lathering her face with her father's shaving brush. She was duly reprimanded and told that she should know better.
"What will I catch, mamma-whiskers?" inquired Thelma anxiously.

- From Kansas City Journal.
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