Stupid Men Jokes Vol. 4

QUESTION: What do men and tile floors have in common?
ANSWER: If you lay them well, you can walk on them for years.


He: "It is crowded here, don't you think? I thought you went early to avoid the rush."
She: "So I did; but about five thousand other people did the same thing."

QUESTION: What is the difference between a man and a catfish?
ANSWER: One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.


"Yes, dear, I'm going out tonight. I've been asked to take supper with an old comrade in arms."
She: "By the way, darling, how many men did your regiment muster?"

QUESTION: What is the only time a man will think about a candlelight dinner?
ANSWER: When the power goes off.

What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
1. No mind.
2. No business.

QUESTION: What do you instantly know about a well-dressed man?
ANSWER: His wife is good at picking out clothes.


Two guys were strolling down the street when one guy exclaimed, "how sad - a dead bird." The other man looked up and said, "where?"

She: "You know you should love your neighbor as yourself."
He: "But the trouble is, when I try to do that, I always end by hating myself."

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A thriving baseball club is one of the features of a boy's organization connected with a prominent church. The team was recently challenged by a rival club. The pastor gave a special contribution of five hundred dollars to the captain, with the direction that the money should be used to buy bats, balls, gloves, or anything else that might help to win the game. On the day of the game, the pastor was somewhat surprised to observe nothing new in the club's paraphernalia. He called the captain to him.
"I don't see any new bats, or balls, or gloves," he said.
"We haven't anything like that," the captain admitted.
"But I gave you five hundred dollars to buy them," the pastor exclaimed.
"Well, you see," came the explanation, "you told us to spend it for bats, or balls, or gloves, or anything that we thought might help to win the game, so we gave it to the umpire."

Stupid Man Jokes