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Stupid Men Jokes
Vol.5
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HEREDITY
Son: "Father, do you really believe in heredity?"
Father: "Most certainly I do. That is how I came into
all my money." |
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Did you hear about the banker
who's a great
lover?
He knows first-hand the penalty
for early
withdrawal. |
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Husband:
I
don't know why
you wear a bra, you've got nothing to put in it?
Wife: You
wear briefs, don't
you?
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Student: "What I
want to know is, am I a bass or
a baritone?"
Teacher: "No—you're
not." |
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BETTER THAN IT SOUNDS
Jim: "Can you play bridge tonight?"
John: "Sorry. Going to hear some Wagner."
Jim: "What—do you like the stuff?"
John: "Frankly, no; but I've heard on the best authority
that his music's
very
much better than it sounds." |
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Foreman: "'Ow is it
that little feller always
carries two
planks to
your one?"
Laborer: "'Cos
'e's too blinkin' lazy to go back
for the
other one." |
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A DIAMOND
The Professor: A
diamond is the hardest known
substance,
inasmuch as
it will cut glass.
The Cynic: Glass!
My dear sir, a diamond will
even make an
impression
on a woman's heart. |
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Boss: "But, Jenkins,
the name of the complaint is
not
pewmonia.
Surely, you've heard me again and again say 'pneumonia'?"
Jenkins: "Well,
Sir, I 'ave; but I didn't
like to correct
you." |
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