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Humor About Men Vol.5
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He Says-She Says
- A man is
a
person who, if a
woman says, "Never mind, I'll do it myself," lets her.
- A woman
is a person who, if she says to a man, "Never
mind, I'll do
it myself," and if he lets her, gets mad.
- A man is a person who, if a
woman says to
him, "Never mind, I'll do it myself," and he lets her and she gets mad,
says, "Now what are you mad about?"
- A woman is a person who, if she says
to a man,
"Never mind, I'll
do it myself," and he lets her, and she gets mad, and he says, "Now
what
are you mad about?" says, "If you don't know I'm not going to tell
you."
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Mangoes
Two crazy men
wanting to pull down
mangoes. They
started to throw stones at the mangoes but it was impossible to hit
one.
One crazy man told the other "How will we know if the mangoes we are
trying to knock down are ripe and juicy?"
The other one said: " Why you don't go up the tree and see if the
mangoes
are ripe and juicy in that way we will know if we are just wasting time
throwing and throwing stones at those mangoes.
The man came down and said "Yes, the mangoes are ripe and juicy that
means that we could continue throwing mangoes until we hit them
down.
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Question:
What's the difference between men
and pigs?...
Answer: Pigs don't turn into men
when they
drink.
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Send
a link or joke to a friend
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ENTERTAINMENT
A lady who had arranged an authors'
reading at her house succeeded
in
persuading her reluctant husband to stay home that evening to assist in
receiving the guests. He stood the entertainment as long as he
could—three
authors, to be exact—and then made an excuse that he was going to open
the front door to let in some fresh air. In the hall he found one of
the
servants asleep on a settee.
"Wake up!" he
commanded, shaking the
fellow roughly. "What does this
mean, your being asleep out here? You must have been listening at the
keyhole."
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AFFECTION
There are as many aspects of grief as there
are persons to mourn. A
quality of pathetic and rather grisly humor is to be found in the
incident of an English laborer, whose new wife died. The vicar on
calling to condole with man found him pacing to and fro
in the living-room with her body in his arms. As the clergyman
spoke phrases of sympathy, the man, with tears streaming down his
cheeks, interrupted loudly:
"Oh, sir, you don't know how I loved her. Yus, sir, if
it
worn't agin the law, I'd keep her, an' have her stuffed, that I would!" |
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