Humor From Work Vol.3

Study For America's Corporate Recreation Preferences

The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is: BASKETBALL
The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is: BOWLING
The sport of choice for front line workers is: FOOTBALL
The sport of choice for supervisors is: BASEBALL
The sport of choice for middle management is: TENNIS
The sport of choice for corporate officers is: GOLF

The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.

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An office manager arrives at his department and sees an employee sitting behind his desk totally stressed out. He gives him the advice: "I went home every afternoon for two weeks and had myself pampered by my wife. It was fantastic and it really helped. You should try it too!".
Two weeks later when the manager arrives at his department he sees the man happy and full of energy at his desk. The faxes are piling up and the computer is running at full speed. 
"I see you followed my advice?".
"I did", answers the employee, "It was great! By the way I didn't know you had such a nice house!".

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The professor was delivering the final lecture of the term. He dwelt with much emphasis on the fact that each student should devote all the intervening time preparing for the final examinations.
"The examination papers are now in the hands of the printer. Are there any questions to be asked?"
Silence prevailed. Suddenly a voice from the rear inquired:
"Who's the printer?"

The president of the university had dark circles under his eyes. His cheek was pallid; his lips were trembling; he wore a hunted expression.
"You look ill," said his wife. "What is wrong, dear?"
"Nothing much," he replied. "But—I—I had a fearful dream last night, and I feel this morning as if I—as if I—" It was evident that his nervous system was shattered.
"What was the dream?" asked his wife.
"I—I—dreamed the trustees required that—that I should—that I should pass the freshman examination for—admission!" sighed the president.