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Humor From Work
Vol.5
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TAXES
A young woman walks into accountant's
office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant
says,
"Before we begin, I'll need to ask you a few questions." He gets her
name,
social security number, address, etc. and then asks, "What is your
occupation?"
The woman replies, "I'm a whore." The accountant said: "Oh no, that
will
never work, I don't want to put that as your occupation, try to
rephrase
that." She said: "Ok, I'm a prostitute." Accountant: "Try again." Then
the woman said: "OK I'm a chicken farmer." The accountant asks:
"What
does chicken farming have to do with being a whore or a prostitute?"
"Well,
I raised over 6,000 cocks last year."
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LAST COUCH
A businessman
was traveling in the train and his seat was reserved in the last couch
of the train. Every time the train stops at station and he faced so
much
of problem as all shops to purchase eatables were far off. He was very
upset and every time he was remembering that's all happened because I
am
in the last couch. When he got down at the destination station, he
asked
the station person that he wants to lodge a complaint against the
railway
staff. The complaints and suggestions book was given to him and he
wrote:
"
There should not be any last couch in the train. If there is any last
couch
in the train, it should be kept somewhere in the middle.
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MALE-FEMALE ROLES
An American
on a flight flags down a steward and says, "Captain, I want a drink but
I don't see the stewardess around". The steward answers, "Actually sir,
I'm not the captain. This airline is proud to have integrated many of
the
traditional male-female roles of the industry. I'd be happy to get you
a drink". Passenger: "Wow, what does the captain think of that?"
Steward:
"She's all for it, in fact, the entire flight crew is female."
Passenger:
"I don't believe it!! Take me up to the cockpit so I can see for
myself!"
Steward: "Actually sir, we don't call it that anymore."
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Send
a link or joke to a friend
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COMPROMISES
Boss:
"There's $100 gone from my cash drawer, Johnny; you and I were
the only people who had keys to that drawer."
Office Worker:
"Well, s'pose we each pay $50 and say no more about it." |
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CONFESSION
"You say Jim made a complete confession?
What did he get—five
years?"
"No, fifty thousand dollars. He confessed to the magazine." |
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CRITICISM
FIRST MUSIC CRITIC: "I wasted a whole
evening by going to that new
pianist's
concert last night!"
SECOND MUSIC CRITIC: "Why?"
FIRST MUSIC CRITIC: "His playing was above criticism!" |
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