Marriage & Wedding Humor Vol.8


The newly married man came home from work to find his new bride stretched languorously on the sofa, dressed in a negligee. 
"Guess what I got planned for dinner?" she asked seductively. "And don't you dare tell me you hadit for lunch today."

Small Girl: "To-day's my mummy's wedding-day."
Smaller Girl (with air of superiority): "My mummy was married years ago."


Husband and wife were watching a romantic scene on TV decipting a man and woman reminiscing about the day of the week that they first met, had their first kiss and his proposal, when husband quickly interjected, "What day is today?"
Thinking he was remembering their special days, she said, "Why do you ask?"
"I was just wondering," he replied, "if tonight is garbage night."

Best Man (seeing couple off on honeymoon): "Here you are—just a few magazines to help pass away the time."


"They say that she was his stenographer before marriage."
"She has evidently reversed the order of things."
"How so?"
"She does the dictating now."

Doughter: "He proposed to me last night, mother. What shall I do?"
Mother: "Find how much property he has, my dear!"

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He was a Scot, with the usual characteristics of his race. Wishing to know his fate, he telegraphed a proposal of marriage to the girl of his choice. After waiting all day at the telegraph office he received the affirmative answer late at night.
"Well, if I were you," said the operator, "I'd think twice before I married the girl who kept me waiting for an answer so long."
"Na, Na?" said the Scot. "The girl for me is the girl who waits for the night rates."

Wedding & Marriage Humor


"I know I'm old, but I'm crazy about you," stated Mr. Moneybags. "When I go I'll leave all my fortune to you if you'll have me."
"Have you any bad habits?" asked Miss Goldielocks, thoughtfully.
"Only that I walk in my sleep, if you could call that a bad habit."
"You dear old thing. Of course I'll marry you. And we'll have our honeymoon in front of deep blue water and on the top floor of some tall hotel, won't we?"