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Marriage & Wedding Humor Vol.1


GUIDANCE

On the evening of their wedding night, a young couple finally retired to their hotel room. After making her preparations, Margaret, the bride left the bathroom to find Harold, the bridegroom, praying.
"So what are you doing?"
she asked. 
"I'm praying for guidance," answered the religious young man.
"I'll take care of that," she replied. "You pray for endurance."

"And would you love me as much if my father lost all his money?"
"Has he?"
"Why, no."
"Of course I would, darling."

EXHAUSTED

A woman goes to her doctor complaining that she is exhausted all the time. After the diagnostic tests showed nothing, the doctor gets around to asking her how often she has intercourse.
"Every Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday," she says. 
The doctor advises her to cut out Wednesday.
"I can't," says the woman. "That's the only night I'm home with my husband."

"Is she making a rich marriage?"
"Don't you worry, I should hope to tell you; he is a butcher who has been arrested three times for profiteering."

TIRED

Little Girl (to Bride at wedding reception): "You don't look nearly as tired as I should have thought."
Bride: "Don't I, dear? But why did you think I should look tired?"
Little Girl: "Well, I heard Mummy say to Dad that you'd been running after your groom for months and months."

Prospective Bride: "I am glad I decided to be married in a traveling dress—a wedding dress costs such a lot."
Dressmaker: "Yes, miss, and the next time you wanted to wear it, it would be out of fashion."

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