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Humor About Women Vol.6
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It
sometimes takes a girl a long time to learn that
a
flirtation
is attention without intention.
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Mother: "But, my dear daughter,
you've only known him three
weeks."
Daughter: "I know
that, mother, but on the other hand if I delay
in accepting
him
he might find out some things about me he won't like, too." |
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"I would die for you," said the rich older groom.
"How soon?" asked the practical bride to be. |
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STOLEN
KISS
"I took that
pretty girl from the church home the other night, and
stole
a kiss."
"What did she say?"
"Will that be all?"
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Did you hear that they are
going to stop circumcising
men?
They discovered they were
throwing away the best part. |
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FORTUNE
"Would you have
married me if my
father hadn't left
me a fortune?" the newly married man asked his wife.
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you no matter
who left you a fortune."
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SHE:
"I would like to have a globe
of the Earth."
HE: "What size,
dear?"
SHE: "Life-size, of
course."
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NOTICE
In the hall of a Philharmonic society the
following notice was
posted:
"The seats in this hall are for the use of
the ladies. Gentlemen are
requested to make use of them only after the former are seated."
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| Fame is the feeling that you are the constant subject of
admiration
on the part of people who are not thinking of you.
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Send
a link or joke to a friend
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INQUISITIVENESS
In the train, one of the passengers had an
empty coatsleeve.
The
sharer of his seat was an older lady of an inquisitive turn, and after
a vain effort
to restrain her curiosity, finally hemmed and hawed, and said:
"I beg pardon, sir, but I see you've lost an arm."
The one-armed man picked up the empty sleeve in his remaining hand,
and
felt of it with every evidence of astonishment.
"Bless my soul!" he exclaimed. "I do believe you're right." |
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FAILURES
Little Sally came up to her mother with a
very solemn face. "Is it true, mother," she asked, "that marriage is a
failure?"
Her mother surveyed her thoughtfully for a moment. "Well, Sally," she
finally replied, "If you get a rich husband, it's almost as good as a
failure."
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FOLLOWERS
A man descended from an excursion train and
was wearily making his
way
to the bus, followed by his wife and fourteen children, when a
policeman
touched him on the shoulder and said:
"Come along wid me."
"What for?"
"Blamed if I know; but when ye're locked up I'll go back and find
out
why that crowd was following ye."
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| There are
two kinds of women: The fashionable ones and those who are
comfortable. |
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