Travel Alaska


Humor About Women Vol.4

Woman—the only sex which attaches more importance to what's on its head than to what's in it.


Shortly after the birth of their second child, her husband offered to take her shopping for a new dress. He endured more than two hours of listening to her complaints about which figure flaw each dress accentuated. As she emerged from the dressing room, having tried on the last selection, she asked for her husband's opinion. By this time, he had learned just the right things to say. "It's perfect!" he exclaimed. "It makes your waist look smaller, your legs look longer and slenderizes your hips." 
Just then, a voice from the dressing room piped up. "If there's a dress here that will do all that- I'll take ten!" 


Doctor to the young pregnant woman: 
"Did you and your husband plan this pregnancy?" 
"No" she replied "we just talked about it." There was a pause before doctor said, "That must have been some conversation." 

Doughter to her mother: "What's an orgasm Mom?
I don't know...ask your father. "


The woman at the insurance office inquired as to the costs, amounts paid, etc.
"So," she concluded, "if I pay sixtyfive dollars monthly, you pay me a hundred and fifty thousand dollars if my house burns down. But do you ask questions about how the fire came to start?"
"We make careful investigation, of course," the agent replied.
The woman flounced toward the door disgustedly.
"Just as I thought," she called over her shoulder. "I knew there was a catch in it."

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The sweet little girl had a violent physical fight with her particular close friend.
Her mother reprimanded her, and concluded by saying:
"It was Satan who suggested to you the pulling of Jenny's hair."
"I shouldn't be surprised," the child replied musingly. "But," she added proudly, "slapping her was entirely my own idea."

Martha was remarkable for the size of her mouth. She claimed that she had been insulted by a deacon of her church.
"When I stood up in the church meeting, to relate my experience," Martha explained, "and opened my mouth, the Deacon rose up in front and said, 'Will somebody please close that window, and keep it closed!'"


Several women were discussing what they should have for dinner. "If you're watching your weight," came one suggestion, "those diet frozen dinners are good." The man then added: "But get two. They're small."